On asking why ...
Story, Lord. I don’t get it. Is it really just all about the
story?
Here you made me a writer, and I’ve spent years now,
studying story. Here I am reading Accelerant, and thinking ... Haegan, poised
on the edge of doubt and fear, longing to be released from his own calling ...
yet guarded unseen by two Deliverers. Why? Why Haegan? Why don’t the Deliverers
just mete out divine judgment, and be done with it? Why the long, terrible,
painful journey?
Why my own journey? Why do You choose fallible men to carry
Your word and do Your will? Why do You continue to let us slash and hurt each
other, disappoint each other, trample Your grace and spurn Your mercy, and yet
... You love us? You choose us and draw us into Your kingdom, to have us do
Your work and eventually make something of us?
I don’t get it. What’s the point? Why not torch the word
into oblivion? It’s what we deserve.
And later—much later—I’m thinking about the propensity of
life to set us up for heartbreak. Is that You? Just as we writers search for
the great dramatic irony that fuels our stories, are You also building that
into the story that is our lives?
... when I am weak, then I am strong ...
... God’s light shines brightest in the darkness ...
... after death, then resurrection ...
... His loss, our
gain ...
... humble yourself, and He will exalt you ...
Really, why? What is the point?
And He whispers to me, You
don’t need to know that yet. Just trust.
I realize, maybe that IS the point. To trust. To walk. As I’ve
said before, not the destination (at least not any that we perceive with our
human minds as a destination, here on earth), but the journey.
Every step of the way toward the One who, as He told
Abraham, “I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.”
Because HE is the point. He is our destination.
And I guess that really is all I need in this moment.
And I guess that really is all I need in this moment.
OH so beautiful. And I'm so glad this story resonated with you (with at least SOMEONE haha). Love you, friend!!
ReplyDeleteLove you too, dear one!! And yes ... it most definitely resonates. :'-)
Delete